edit me

i used to write about times. it never worked. i thought it would help me remember. i still forget. things you try the hardest to forget stand clear in your mind while the events most important become far, removed, or grossly fantastical. a great time is hard to re-create. probably because its already gone. living in the moment, you sure are good and well. the bad memories i have dont last. maybe i dont let them, maybe they dont let me (maybe, i'm just lucky enough not to have too many).
often i wonder about nightmares and significance, coincidence and consequence. i'm pretty boring, in that i take most things as they are--when they're really good or really bad, that's when i attribute responsibility or blame. in this fashion, i imagine many people are the same.













there's a reasonable responsibility in not taking things too seriously.
there's conservatism in liberalism too.
luck is not at all involved.
i trust my instinct though it's failed me before (a moment of naivete, on a bus, in a city 7 miles wide, comes to mind).
we make assumptions all too often though, limiting us in many many ways. it becomes harder to look within. i don't konw many people willing to being again. that's a good way to end.
fornow .